I almost shit my pants again!!!!!!!!!! So that made the rest of the day much, much better!!! I was like, Fuck it if I only had potato chips for lunch... I got a pay raise!
Later though, I made a tiny budget of the expenses we have to liquidate by this Friday. With our checks combined, again... we will only have $100 left for food, gas and everything else... depression sunk in again.
When I spoke to Felicia I found myself telling her that I didn't want this anymore, that I was tired of trying, tired of our lives and our financial situation. She tried, futilely, to reassure me that thing were gonna get better and we would eventually champion this situation... yeah... right... we've been saying that for two years... I know I made her feel like shit... I didn't meant to. I took it out on her and all she was trying to do was make me feel better.
I'm sorry baby.
I will try to apologize when I get home and make things better... Well, I guess I should be glad of the pay increase and hopefully this will be the beginning of a new stage in our lives.
1. What is the most humane way to kill an animal?
Eat it
2. When is it acceptable to ignore someone?
When they annoy or piss me off
3. Why do people ask questions when they know the answer already?
Cuz they're blithering idiots
3 comments:
hey! you stole my date jesus link! hahaha! or did i steal that one from you? bah, who knows. You know, i am a person motivated by very few things...i mean i keep a job to cover basic needs: food, shelter. but i am a person who also craves companionship. what *really* motivates me are 2 basic feelings/states of mind. Anger and Love. Anger has caused me to do things i actually needed to do but hadn't gotten off my ass to do. Love has caused me to slow down and smell the roses, i suppose. Anger makes me get the job done, but love makes me want to be a better person. Oh and one more thing: a desire for recognition of a job well done. There's nothing more i detest than not getting recognition for a job well done or someone else taking the credit. I guess it seems like i talk about men alot, but in actuality, odds are i'm not making a move on any of them. I think about it, but usually don't. I think i should talk more about what i'm actually doing to better myself so people don't think i'm stuck in the mud, obsessing over men, eh? Wellllll...i put in my application to attend grad school in UNC CH for fall 05. I sent the recommendation letters out yesterday, put in my transcript requests in yesterday and filled out my basic info online. All i have to do is send them my resume, statement of purpose/bio/career goals, a writing sample and the $60 app fee. I've deferred my enrollment at the other universities i've applyed to earlier this year to next. I'm really hoping for UMD-CP, UNC, well really all of them have their plusses and minuses...yeah, that's my update. Perhaps i should put this in my journal...
Nichelle aka Shelley Beans.
I stole it from you actually. Oh, by the way, job well done on your response (I wouldn't want you to go postal [no pun intended] on me cuz I didn't appraise you...lol).
What's with the Shelly Bean pseudonym... have we entered the schizophrenic stage yet again?!
haha! Reading you call your daughter "The Bean" reminded me of yet another nickname I have. Shelley has always been my nickname, of course, and one day while my me, my aunt n family were out grocery shopping, we came across a can of beans called 'Shelley Beans'. And we brought 'em, fixed them up and those beans were good as hell!!! Too bad they gave EVERYONE a serious case of gas! LOL what fun!
Post a Comment