I finally uploaded Larissa's photos to my server. Check her out, isn't she cute?








This is my wife Felicia with Larissa in the hospital.


This be I... With both of my daughters Fabianna and Larissa.

It's been interesting and extremely busy with both of the babies in the house. At first, everytime Larissa cried, Fabianna began crying too.... LOL. That was funny but she quickly got over that. Fabianna doesn't seem to be jealous of Larissa, at least not yet. Fabianna likes touching, hugging and kissing her all the time. She doesn't cry or act silly when Felicia is feeding or putting Larissa to sleep. Fabianna right now follows me more. She wouldn't go to sleep last night until I got in the bed with her and she could use my arm as a pillow... LOL. I know she's getting really spoiled but, hey... that's the way my dad was with us. He loved us tooooo much, just like I love my kids more than anything.

It's funny how in this country and in this culture people automatically assume that I never met my father, or he wasn't part of my life or that he was abusive or an alcoholic. Paternal negligence or abuse in this country has become the norm practically. In all levels of economic and social hierarchy. Now I'm not saying it doesn't happen elsewhere... but for example, in Mexico, aside from the extremely poor rural areas... this is highly unacceptable for both males and females. Most of the middle to upper class families will not tolerate this behavior or if it does happen, the father is usually frowned upon heavily. But here, it's second nature. I grew up with my father, he loved me and my two younger brothers. He loved and respected my mother until the day he died. They did have their difficulties and at one point came close to divorce... no relationship is perfect I assume. But, he was always there for us, unconditionally. It doesn't bother me for people to ask me if my father was part of my life. I am proud to tell them yes he was, and he loved me very much. But it is sad to see that here it is so acceptable people have the need to ask.

One time, when Felicia was pregnant with Fabianna in 2002, we went to a new parent seminar type thing. They separated the mothers from the fathers. In the mother's room there were about 25-30 women. Only 5 of them, including Felicia, had their husbands or boyfriends with them. 5 out of fucking 30!. Anyway, so we get thrown into the "daddy's room" with some priest who was to conduct the seminar (Funny how it was failed to mention to me until I got there that the seminar was christian oriented, LOL). The priest did his little intro and in it he mentioned that his father was not part of his life and this priest became "like the father he never had" and blah blah blah... Then, just like in Kindergarten, he wanted to go around the table and introduce ourselves and talk about our lives and fathers. I went last cuz I'm a rebel like that... lol. Well, everybody, except for me had some horrible story of abuse, neglect or alcoholism. When it came time for me to, presumably give my horrible story... I simply told them the truth... and they looked at me as if I was the abnormal one!!!!! It was almost as if they didn't believe me. I guess the priest noticed I felt uncomfortable that I was being drilled with dumb questions and steered the focus away to another subject. I'm telling you, it was one of the oddest moments I've had in a while because I felt bad for children... it was as if, at that exact moment I realized how bad children have it nowadays with parents who have experienced those situations... but what can you do except type your little frustration rant in your lame blog and hope one day everything goes back to normal..... IT'S A MADHOUSE, A MADHOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I'm getting carried away with the Planet of the Apes quotes, lol

So last night I had to share a duplex-type room with James in the hotel. It was cool, we each had a big ass room with bathrooms and then of course we shared the kitchen and living room. I got the king size bed though! HEHEHEHEHE... Well, we got out of work at 10 pm and we went to the parking lot to get our cars, drive to Harris Teeter (a local grocery store) to buy toiletries (hehe, that sounded gayish again) and beer. When I stepped out to the parking lot the snow was up to my knees!!!! Now, I am 6'2" and the fucking snow was UP TO MY KNEES!!!! I'm like, OH SHIT, we're not getting out of here... The snow was falling heavily and it was windy as hell. There were huge chunks of ice flakes making it hard to keep your head straight before they stung your eyes. When I got out to the parking lot, James (another James) and Scott were out there trying to move their cars and they told me they couldn't so they were walking to the hotel. The hotel is not that far away, maybe half a mile... but the snow was knee deep! So me and james decided that we would give a shot and move ours. After about 20 minutes of futile attempts to move our little cars...
I drive a Nissan 200SX

and he rides a Honda Civic

we gave up and started walking to the hotel room. It was funny, we looked like hikers in the Andes or something... LOL. James was fucking dying cuz he's even more out of shape than I. Almost right before we got there we decided to go to the gas station next to the hotel (well, almost next to the hotel) and got some beer... LOL! The rest of the night was pretty much watching tv and drinking nasty Tecate beer.

I felt bad about leaving Felicia alone with the babies. But even if I had chosen to go home instead of staying at the hotel I would not have been able to get the car out of the snow. Today, I've been here since 10 am and I still have 5 more hours to go before I can go home and see my family. I am really missing them right now. But fortunately we have the entire weekend to look forward to. I want to take Fabianna to play in the snow with Sharmeen's kids. I want to hold Larissa and kiss and hug my wife... I am such a fucking Kodak moment commercial cliche sometimes... lol.

I was finally able to take my car off the snow earlier today. The roads are pretty clear but the non circulated areas are still covered with snow. I hope it doesn't melt by tomorrow. Tonight we are supposed to be in the 20's so it will freeze hopefully keeping the snow a little longer so I can take Fabianna to play. I feel tired as hell, I don't know why. I slept ok last night... aside form the insomnia problem... I think I fell asleep around 3:30 am or so... woke up around 8:45 when Felicia called me. Maybe I'm just fed up of being here. But I don't mind the work so much, I guess I just feel bad that I'm inside when it's sooooo snowy outside... I love the snow. GOD!!!! FIVE MORE FUCKING HOURS... SOMEBODY SHOOT ME!!!! LOL....

Well, I guess I don't have anything more to write... Here are the Friday five.

1. Where are you right now?
Sadly, at work.

2. What have you lost recently?
My will to go out and party every weekend... married life! DAMNS YOU MARRIED LIFE! DAMNS YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3. What was the first CD you ever purchased? Does that embarrass you now?
I really do not recall the first CD I ever bought, but I recall the first tape I ever bough. It was Appetite for Destruction by Guns N' Roses. No, I am not ashamed now, I consider it one of the Heavy Metal masterpieces of all times. If you ever want to show some alien, caveman, amish, jehova's witness or someone who's been living under a rock all his or her life what Rock N' Roll is, and I'm talking about pure, unadulterated Rock N' Roll, play Appetite for Destruction for them. It's the personification of Rock N' Roll at its decadent finest. But in the early nineties, during my grunge days in Seattle, I was ashamed of admitting to listening to them... LOL.


4. What is your favorite kind of writing pen?
huh?

5. What is your favorite ice cream flavor?
Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia

Wow, I hadn't updated this in quite some time. Actually, the main reason is because I usually updated my blog during work but recently they are getting their panties on a wad about us accessing the internet at work. Mostly because some people are viewing pornography. who knows!

So much has happened since I last updated this. I actually gave up my high school friends search. Mostly because I wasn't succeeding and partly because my focus shifted to my new daughter.

YES! I AM A FATHER... AGAIN!!!!!!!!

So, Larissa is finally here, Larissa was born on Saturday February 21, 2004 at 6:03 pm. Felicia had a hard time dilating to the required.... amount? size? whatever... you know what I'm saying. Luckily they gave her a good dose of epidural and she was not in pain during the delivery. Anyway, the doctor said the baby wasn't coming because she had placed herself looking upwards which caused her not to be able to squeeze through naturally. Fortunately everything turned out great and the baby came with no complications. Both my mom and my mother in law were there. My mom, although she had three kids of her own via C-section, had never seen a vaginal birth and bursted in tears when Larissa arrived. Her second granddaughter, you could tell she was very excited. Felicia's mom always cries too, she's very emotional... she didn't cry as much this time as she did when Felicia had Fabianna though.... Soooooo, yeah!... wow... a father again. You know, I look at both of them and I feel.... blessed. I guess that's the only way I can describe it... how can I, a fucked up, lazy, foul mouthed, ex junkie create something so beautiful and perfect in every way? What did I do to deserve a wife like Felicia and such beautiful kids? I don't know but I have never been the type to only ask God why something happens to me when things go wrong. Maybe is due to my lack of faith in christianity and that part still embedded in my mind since I was a little catholic boy that God does everything for a reason. Maybe they're just hang ups I can't change from when my parents taught me to fear and love God at the same time... I don't know... but I thank him/her/it (you choose) for what he/she/it (choose again) has given me.

So, while Felicia was in the hospital I was hanging out with Fabianna all the time. I realize now that Fabianna became very attached to me in those few days and vice versa. her and I sleep in the main bedroom now and Felicia sleeps with Larissa until she's a couple of months old. I don't have that hard of a time putting her to sleep anymore and she likes to cuddle near me. Sometimes I spend that seems like hours staring at her when she's sleeping. Nothing compares to that, it's the most beautiful, unselfish, ethereal feeling I've ever felt. She listens to me more and even, although very seldom, does what I tell he to... LOL. Now, I have returned to work after a week of being out and spending most of my time with my family. It feels a bit strange... I miss them of course. Sad thing is... tonight, I won't come home...

Today we had heavy snow in the Charlotte area. It started early in the morning and it is still coming down hard. Which, to those who read this masterpiece on a regular basis, if you can recall I will be provided a room in the Staybridge Suites by my company so I don't miss work tomorrow and assure I work some OT. That part is kinda cool, they're good suites and the snow is really deep to be driving at night. The party that sucks is that I will not be next to my family. Last time I stayed I was not able to sleep because I missed them soooooooo much. Felicia doesn't want me to stay. But I really need and want the overtime. I feel so bad for not returning home because I know Felicia hates it when I'm not there. But I really want the OT not to mention, after being out for a week due to Larissa's birth, I kinda want to make it up to Brian, my supervisor because he was so cool and understanding about my absence. This time around I'm sharing a duplex-type suite with James. That's kinda cool I guess... he said the suite is equipped with an X-Box... that's even sweeter. So, I'm stuck here til about 10 pm and then off to the hotel. I just realized though, that since I didn't plan to stay before I left the house, I didn't bring any toiletries (hehe... that sounded kinda gayish). My hair is kinda Jedi and I need tons of hair goop to get it to spike.... cuz that's what pseudo cool people do too, spike their hair. No deodorant, toothbrush or anything else... Damn, it's gonna be rough tomorrow! LOL.

Let's see... OH! I downloaded Bearshare which is this cool file sharing software. It's got everything and it's FREE!!!!!! I have downloaded and burnt so much shit. From Before the next teardrop falls by Freddy Fender to Bedtime for Democracy by The Dead Kennedys. Also, James downloaded all of Kill Bill Vol. 1 and Once Upon a Time in Mexico. This site is cool as hell and it has made me into a download junkie thief all over again. I feel like when I was IV'ing Napster and Audiogalaxy... LOL.

Well, I guess that's all for today. I will try to keep up with this again.

I don't feel like updating this today so I will just do the Wednesday Whatevers...

Wednesday Whatevers

1. What is your greatest weakness? Explain.
Being selfish, sometimes I only think about how tough it is is for me and how my life sucks and blah, blah, blah. When in reality there's people out there who have it a million times worse than I do.

2. What do you avoid at all costs?
Ghonorrea...LOL. Ummm... no, actually I avoid DYING at all costs! I also avoid seeing my family suffer.

3.If you could stop time, what would you do?
Be bored.

Well, apparently every body and their grandmother's pet squirrel have knowledge of or visited my blog at work. Even some people that I don't know. Today, one of the guys from IT (I think) said he read it. Well, I don't know if people at work reading or knowing about my blog is a good or bad thing but do know that this is my space and everybody is here out of his or her own volition. I use this space to vent out my frustrations. I was under the impression that only I, Felicia and a couple of friends read this crap. Well, at least people should leave a message so I'd know others are reading it and I don't mean so I can try to cover shit up or anything, but it placates my ego... LOL. If I ever piss anyone off or insult anyone... trust me, more than likely, it was my full intention to do so.

Ok, with that out of the way, I am still hunting down a lot of my High School friends via Internet, phone books and relatives. I was able to retrieve some pictures from my mom's house that I will post below with interesting (at least to me) side scripts. I was able to locate thanks to the Internet two more friends, Rob (who apparently now goes by Raab) and Claudine. I also happen to have pictures of both of them, yay! I found out that Raab has been traveling and touring a lot with bands. He is currently part of a band called Red Earth which is like a tribal/Native American influenced rock band. If I remember correctly, Raab himself was a black foot (or part) Indian. When I met him, me and him were the only two that liked both rock and hip-hop. At the time he was in a band called Captain Raab and the patrolling fartknockers (LOL!). He didn't hang out much with us, but he was always really cool and laid back. I don't think he did drugs, drank or smoked either. He was one of the most laid back, coolest people you could ever meet.

The other person I found was one of the girls "that got away" (LOL). Claudine Hernandez... Claudine came from another school during our either sophomore or Junior year and was much younger than I. At first, both me and my cousin Carlos wanted to get with her. She was quiet and shy and immediately started hanging out with Mila. This seemed odd to us cuz Mila was loud and obnoxious (but in an ok way I guess, LOL). I guess the fact that they were both Philippino made it easier for her. Anyway, eventually somehow or another I was the one talking to her and Carlos either lost interest or started dating someone else... the drugs kinda made high school a big daze. Sadly though, I never got with her but I can't really remember why. She, along with Jessica and Danielle were the last few girls I remember "courting" before I was shipped back to Texas. Claudine now works for The Parenting Clinic which is part of UDub. She is also, obviously, a U-Dub student. It's funny that she looks exactly the same as she did back then. I have not been able to find anybody else, but trust me... I will keep on looking.

I've also decided that once I'm done with the Seattle crew... LOL. I will start with the Houston crew and then the Mexico crew. The Mexico one I left until the end because it will be the absolute easiest to find since I still have a lot of ties and keep in contact with most of my friends there. I guess this will be my little hobby for the next few months or until I get bored and tired of looking for people. I am really doing this for nothing else than pure self gratification and curiosity... and maybe cuz I miss some of my friends... LOL.

These are some of the pictures I found. They're divided in three areas; Graffiti, Droogs, Friends and Hoodratz... I like the last category the best.... lol.

GRAFFITI

This is Jay in front of a piece we did for Cascade Elite Gymnastics in Lynwood, WA, hence the CEG. I don't have a picture of the finished piece but it went through several different stages before we were happy with it. There's another stage on a previous post of it. That was our first legal piece and they paid us $200 for it. This was back in 93 or 94.



This is Carlos in front of a piece [top] he made on a North Seattle "freewall". The DOG [bottom] was a group effort between the four of us.


This piece was volunteer work for something called "The Neutral Zone". "The Neutral Zone" was a pathetic, hippie attempt to remove gangs and high school kids of the streets after dark and "concentrate" them in "The Neutral Zone" where no gang colors were allowed, no drugs, no weapons... They had the walls covered with graffiti and the rooms (or psycholaundering chambers) each had a specific purpose. They had the library filled with urban and alternative (to persuade most ethnic backgrounds) magazines like "Street Beat", "Thrasher" and "Hip Hop Magazines"; they also had a pool room, an arcade room, an alcohol free soda fountain type bar, chess, D&D, checkers and just about every board game you can imagine. Sadly though, only the geeky kids showed up to play D&D when the rest of us were out doing more graffiti and poisoning the youth. Anyway, they told us the graffiti had to send a positive message and we couldn't portray guns or drugs (SHIT! That's all we knew!!). They wanted the words "UNITE", "TOGETHER" and a bunch of other tree-hugging hippie crap so we tried but at the end we didn't like being told what to do and we finished it and left and didn't wait for their opinion or anything. Sadly these are all the graffiti pictures I was able to find but I will dig further to see if more were salvaged.

"THE DROOGS"

This picture was taken probably in 1994. I remember it was at the party of a guy named Ken. Actually, if memory serves me right, Friday kicked my ass that night for being drunk and taking the last beer. LOL!!!! Then, he pulled a bottle of tequila and we kept getting drunk together... hehe. Anyway, from left to right: Dung (R.I.P. Dung had asthma and one time he, Jay, Justin and Joe went to swim at Echo Lake in N. Seattle. From what I'm told, cuz I was stuck at work, he had an asthma attack halfway through the lake and drowned.), Keith, Justin, Brock, Carlos, Mark (I think that was his name, he was just a kid he hung out with us every now and then. I think he was a freshman which kicked Carlos out of the youngest spot since by this picture Carlos was a Sophomore.), Marlon and kneeling is me and some dude that everybody hated cuz he was a fucking asshole and a moron, I think his name was Anthony. I called him Craig Mack cuz he was ugly as hell and had a fucked up 'fro.


This is us on a Park n' Ride on our way to the "freewall" on N. Seattle. Joe is sends his greetings.


Joe posing trying to look cooler than he actually was... LOL! Sadly, the thing I remember most about this picture is the girl on the poster.


After I got my uncle and his family evicted from an apartment complex in Lynnwood, we had to move to Mountlake Terrace (which is five steps away). In the Lynnwood apartment I shared a room with Carlos and Neto had his own room as well as my aunt and uncle. Well, the Mountlake Terrace apartment only had two rooms and a huge walk in storage closet on the inside. Guess who got stuck in the closet. LOL! But it was cool I didn't mind... it was like one of those attic rooms, I had everything but windows... LOL. This is where Joe and J are sitting, in my closet/ makeshift room. My walls were covered with future graffiti works of art we bombed. In case you were wondering what J is doing, he was rolling a joint.


I don't know what the hell we were thinking or who the hell we were trying to impress but this is our gang wannabe picture (with the exception of Dung who was in a real gang.) [top] left to right: Raab throwing a "Little Valley" sign which if I recall correctly is a native American gang or reservation or community or something, Myself (Your lord and master) throwing a "Vatos Locos" sign cuz I had just watched Bound by Honor, Justin throwing a Bloods sign (only god knows why), Dung throwing a "Crip Killer" sign cuz he was a blood. Carlos is actually in the picture but you can't see him. [bottom]Raab, Jason throwing something but I have no clue what, Justin, Dung and Carlos with the Dallas Cowboys outfit. That night we were high on several different things so I have no idea what the fuck we were doing or even where we were. These were all the pics I could find of my friends.

GIRLS (yay!)

Since the first person whom I found was Danielle and she was practically the one who, unbeknownst to her gyrated me into this search for my old classmates I will begin with her. The picture I had found of her from Western Washington Univ. is broken now and when I went to that page all the pictures are broken. I should have saved it but if it comes back up I will. Anyway, the top picture is the one Danielle gave me in 10th grade for yearbook. I was too much of a pseudo rebel to ever take high school pictures so you will NEVER find me on any of my old high school yearbooks (lol). The second picture she gave me the day I was supposed to go over to her house and hit on her but I was too dumb to. She said she wanted me to have that before I returned to Texas. Now she's married and in California... cool!


The next in line is Jessica, asshole Joe called her "snow white" cuz she was really light skinned... shit, the girl was almost pink! LOL. Jessica was probably the first girl I ever developed any type of feelings for in my life. I wouldn't call it love, but definitely if given the length of time it would have developed into that. Jessica and I started dated mere weeks before I was shipped to Texas so it didn't last long. I met her in Spanish class and drooled over her for a long time but never had the balls to tell her because I was a junkie and she was a smart student. Thankfully, I had asshole friends and Justin has Spanish class with us and he, in a mostly malicious way told her for me in front of the hold class. The top pic is in our Spanish class, as you can tell, I was the idiot who sat in the back never paying attention and she was a good student in the front. The bottom left is a picture we took together with Eun, her best friend, shortly before we started dating. I cut myself out of the pic cuz I looked like a retard. Well, I still do but back then I had a much lower self-esteem than now.. lol. And the bottom right is her prom picture... Sad story (*deep sigh*), I was supposed to go with her and we had made plans and arrangements and everything... I was psyched cuz I am not the type to go to the prom, until I met her it never even entered my mind, but since I was going with Jessica I was excited. Then my uncle and his family moved back to Texas shortly before the end of school and she ended up going with someone else... damn it... this was supposed to be a good trip down memory lane, now I know why I needed years of therapy to start a relationship after that... LOL!


Claudine I already told you about above... This is her then.


And this is her now


Alicia Bird... Alicia and I became really good friends, then I introduced her to Jay and they hit it off. After I moved to Texas they were still together for a long time. That's all I remember.


Anna was in my P.E. class but never really hung out outside of that class. Although we were really good friends she continually was on my case because I wasn't Christian. She was one of the smart, cool kids so we had different crowds.


April was the first friend I had when I moved to Washington. I met her while working at Taco Bell. She found out we went to the same high school and we started talking. I think she liked me, I liked her too but she had this on and off dumbass wigger of a boyfriend who thought he was a gangbanger. That kid was volatile and dangerous. On the back of this picture it says "Javier- I'm really glad we met and became friends. Hopefully someday we can be closer. I want you to know you call me any any time you need someone to talk to. You're a very sweet person and a good looking guy. Keep in touch and I won't lose contact with you either. Love =Amber=" Here's the pathetic thing, up until about ONE WEEK AGO I had never realized how much that message was a FUCKING INVITATION FOR ME TO ASK HER OUT!!!!!!!! I think I'm finally beginning to realize that drugs weren't such a good idea in high school! LOL!!! Anyway, with Amber it was an on again off again friendship and thinking back now, I can see how most of the thing she would say or do were in a flirtatious way... but I was usually not paying attention. Not cuz I didn't like her, but because I didn't like her friends or her wigger on/off boyfriend. I think eventually we lost contact and she dropped out of school, we saw her at a Grateful Dead concert in downtown Seattle a year or two later and she had a kid.


Jaime Schultz was one of the most beautiful girls you'd ever seen. She was half Japanese half White. When I was a senior she was a freshman. She was dating Mark (see picture above) but her and I became really good friends. Her sister Tracy, who was almost as pretty but had a slutty reputation, dated Joe for a while. And the girl in the picture below with Jamie...

was called Jennifer. We called her "Bob" because this chick was practically the high school's bicycle, everyone took a ride! The name "Bob" comes from "bobbing"... get it? get it? Anyway, for some reason (that I do not know nor care to know) Jay dated her for quite some time as well. Maybe all that experience made her a really good fuck... god knows! Tracey and "Bob" were really good friends... maybe even more.. LOL! She would fall more into the Hoodratz category but she was in the picture with Jamie and she's not.

HOODRATZ

The first group of hoodratz we would be discussing (lol) belonged to another school actually. They went to Lynwood High which was in... well, Lynwood, WA. Lynwood HS and Edmonds-Woodway were rivals in both scholastics and sports as well as street gang and just rivalry for no other reason than being from different schools. But from time to time there was a crossover of either friends or relationships. In our case, I was dating Richie who is the girl on the top picture. Hence we met the rest of the, what was later dubbed, Asian Hoodratz. Richie and I dated for maybe a month or so... then we ended up in fights everytime we drove to Lynwood so we stopped. I don't really know the girls that will. In the second picture is Richie and Sherry, I know Sherry cuz she's Mexican too and we kinda hung out a few times. From the very bottom pic I only know Richie and Sherry.

>
Brenna Ramos came from California... Pico Rivera to be exact with is part of East Los Angeles. Brenna was a REAL hoodrat whom grew up amongst REAL gang members. She was not impressed by any of us because of that, not to mention SHE WAS FINE! LOL! The odd thing with her was that at school we had these two mixed kids who were brother and half Mexican and half Irish. They reject their Irish ancestry and claimed to be full-blooded Mexicans. The rest of us Mexicans, either out of high school meanness or pride, rejected them completely and the whole school saw them as clowns. James claimed Sur XIII, which he claimed it was a faction of a larger all Mexican California Crip street gang. All we knew is that both the Mexican and the Irish kids beat the fuck out of them on a regular basis for being dumbasses. Oh, sorry, got sidetracked there... Brenna found James' antics fascinating, she claimed he was a real gang member and whatever... Oscar and me almost kicked the shit out of him because Oscar (one of the bigger Mexican cool kids) liked her. Eventually she moved back to California and we never heard from her or James again

>
Mila, Claudine, Sherry and Maria. Claudine was not a hoodrat by any means, but she hung out with Mila and Mila was one. Mile hung out with some Hispanic hoodratz from Lynwood such as Sherry and Maria. I knew Sherry pretty well but had only seen Maria a few times cuz me and her "vato" (lol) got in a fight a few weeks earlier.

>
Melissa was one of those hoodratz who tried annoyingly to be accepted. Melissa was like a mini "Bob" cuz she'd screw anybody to be part of the large group of us who always hung out. I don't know what ever happened to her.

>
Lastly, Monique McBeth... I hardly knew Monique. We only talked when one of her "boyfriends" brought her around to the group. She was responsible for Keith and Ryan (whom were the closest friends) falling out and getting in a fistfight. That was harsh cuz they were really cool and the best of friends. I guess that's the only thing that made Monique infamous amongst us and of course she did look good... but she was too high maintenance for any of us... LOL!

Edmonds Woodway, or at least the facility that we attended, was bulldozed after my class graduated in 1994. It was rebuilt at a different location the following school year. I never visited the new location since I moved to Texas shortly before graduation. There are so many more good friends that I don't have pictures of that I wish I could see again. So many experiences and good times. I will continue my search and post my findings here... I am tired of typing so I will continue later.

Continuing with my melancholic trip down memory lane, last night I went to Chili's with my family and I told them about my little reminiscing moments at work. Serg happened to have Neto's (Carlos' brother) telephone number in Austin, TX. We figured we could get the Carlos' Seattle telephone number from him. When we called though, Carlos picked up the phone. That was a nice surprise. He told me he moved to Austin in November 2002 because he wasn't doing shit in Seattle. He told me about some of our old friends... J and Joe were still living the same lifestyle, apparently they never grew out of it. That's sad...LOL. Marlon was hustling for a long time then had children and moved in with a girl so he stopped. He told me that he dated Tonie, who is Danielle's sister (see previous post) for the past five years. He said Danielle would ask him about me all the time... awwww... LOL! Anyway, Danielle got married and currently lives in California and we spent a good hour on the phone just talking about all that shit. This morning as soon as I woke I started looking for old pictures but I found very few cuz I realized they're all my mom's house. These were the few I could find...


(L to R) Joe [URGE], Me [NEZA], Jason [SPLAT] and Carlos [KROME]

(L ro R) Me, Jason and Carlos (I think Joe took the pic)






Now that I look at it, we weren't even that good at it.. LOL! But we got better towards the end. I will get the rest of the pictures and post them later on today. I guess that's all!

We're going to the store to buy a new TV and entertainment center!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I'm such a child, LOL)

Yesterday was another hellish sleepless night with Fabianna. This time, even Felicia (who is a million times more patient than I) lost her cool. My mother, who babysits for us from like 7 pm until I get there at 9:30 pm or so, purposely did not allow her to get any sleep while she was with her. When I got there my mom was so beat and tired that I felt like shit. But at least, or so I thought, she would fall asleep early tonight since she has not take her little nap (she usually naps from 1 or 2 in the afternoon to 3 or so and from like 7:30 or 8 pm to 10:30 or so). Well, I get home with her and she is fucking wired. The girl is jumping and dancing and running and screaming and crying for no reason and just being spoiled. It got so bad we had to dump her in her crib and let her cry but you'd think somebody was sticking needles in her eyeballs the way that girl was screaming. After about 1/2 an hour of mind numbing, heart tearing screaming, we gave in and took her out. At about 2:30 exhaustion finally got her and she went to sleep... We need help... maybe ritual suicide would do the trick........................................

Today I started reminiscing about High School. Even though I went to two different high schools in my life, I always only see Edmonds-Woodway in Edmonds, Washington as the main high school. Mostly because that's where I became one of THE popular kids and had all my cool experiences. In Hanna which is in Brownsville, Texas, I was pretty much the loser kid who just got lost in the shuffle with either the punks and metalheads or the border crossers who barely spoke English. In Edmonds, I was the cute Mexican kid with the sexy accent... lol! Not to mention one of the most rebel and daring junkies in the Tri City area along with my three other droogs: Jason (a.ka. "Jay" or The letter "J"), Joe (J's twin brother) and Carlos (my younger cousin)... All four of us were the tightest of a larger group of friends. All four of us were the H n' R crew (which stood for Hit and Run). H n' R was a graffiti crew that the four of us formed because we didn't want anything to fuck up "our style" LOL! At that time, graffiti crews, break dance crews (in the Northwest Territory it made a comeback in the early and mid-90's) and lame ass gangs were all the rave there. Most of our friends were in one or more of the three groups I mentioned above. The rest of our friends, who from time to time would come bomb with us, were each heavier in other things than graffiti... for example, Justin (he was this crazy ghetto white boy) was really into singing and choir and drugs. Dung (pronounced "Yoon", and don't laugh cuz he's dead now. R.I.P.) was really into his Vietnamese street gang (they were bloods I think) and drugs. Marlon was hustling all the time and drugs. Keith was into girls (he was the mac dad of the crew... LOL) and drugs. Clay, Keith (the same Keith as above) Brock, Nathaniel and Tony were into their rap groups and drugs. Nathaniel and Tony's were called Prophets of Poetry or Profits of Poetry... I forget. Clay, Keith and Brock never got far enough to get a name but they would constantly freestyle and get together in Brock's basement to record. Those days were cool... drugs, chicks, music and friends... it was the shit in that basement. There were a bunch of little hoodrats that came and went through the years but none of them ever stayed after they fucked one of us or dated one of us and then the relationship failed. Man, those were some good as times... damn I'm getting old.

Anyway, that last rant down memory lane only led to me going into that Classmates.com page and look for my old friends. Turns out very few of my old droogs had registered for the service and the few who did, didn't have any contact info. So I started looking for their names on Google and Yahoo. None of them yielded results... So I started putting random names of friends, ex-girlfriends and people I knew or heard of in high school. The only one that gave me any results, ironically enough, was my first black, almost-girlfriend (lol) Danielle Gray. Me and Danielle never dated much less had sex, we both knew we liked each other but she was dating a little preppy, all star sports kid . I can't remember his name but they called him Carlton cuz he acted just like Carlton from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Anyway, at some point they broke up and that's when she finally decided to call me and invite me over her house... LOL. I was so excited the only thing I DIDN'T DO was to hit on her. After I left I was like, what a fucking dumbass I was... she was begging for me to make a move and I didn't... LOL. Later, I hooked up with Jessica, a girl I was drooling over from Spanish class and forgot all about Danielle. LOL... I'm such a dick sometimes. Jessica by the way and ironically enough as well, was the first white girl I ever dated... I did find a picture of Danielle online. She now goes or went to Western Washington University.



Anyway, I don't know why I posted all this information since you don't know any of the people I mentioned. Maybe I am going through a quarter life crisis... who knows? But it was nice to reminisce about all the people I knew at about one of the best times of my life. A lot of times I wish I can go back to Washington to visit all my old friends and see what they're up to. Carlos, my cousin still lives up there, maybe I should get his number someday from my uncle and call him up. Well, I guess that's all... here are the Friday Fives.

1. What's the most daring thing you've ever done?
HA! I don't think I can pick one... not to mention, I'm a married man now, some things are better left in the dark... LOL!!!!

2. What one thing would you like to try that your mother/friend/significant other would never approve of?
I don't know... I can't think of anything... a ménage a trois maybe?

3. On a scale of 1-10, what's your risk factor? (1=never take risks, 10=it's a lifestyle)
Currently???? shit... like 2. But back in the day, I don't think you would be able to measure it from 1-10

4. What's the best thing that's ever happened to you as a result of being bold/risky?
umm... sex in public (don't read that part Felicia... I didn't just say that, ok?)

5. ... and what's the worst?
I got my uncle's family evicted from an apartment complex cuz I graffitied the entire entry foyer of the complex. I still feel like shit for that one.

I filed my taxes early this year (mostly at Felicia's request) and I was bitch slapped with the awesome surprise that I got over $4500.00 back. I almost had an orgasm right there on the tax preparer's table when she told me...!!!! So. two days later we got our check and the first thing we did was wire some money to the U.S. Department of Education because they were threatening to garnish my wages if I didn't make a payment. Story goes like this... Since 1998 I have only paid like $500.00 of a student loan that ascends to about $1000.00. So, naturally, THEY WANT THEIR MONEY!. We also decided to pay rent two months in advance and Felicia's car payment two months in advance. So, thankfully we're set for now. Also, thanks to the money, I was able to go to Hot Topic and buy something for Ricky’s birthday. I got him several rubber bracelets, three wrist bands (one with the letter "R", one with a cool bobby pin and a metal star attached to it, and a black and gray checkerboard one), I also got him a punk looking watch with metal studs and my mom got him one of those HUGE flared pants that kids use now a days (I'm such an old man). Well, out of all the shit that we got him he only liked the watch and the wristband with the "R" in it. The least he could have done is PRETEND he liked the fucking things... LOL! But it's ok.. I mean, he's sixteen and this weekend we're either taking him to Kabuto's (He loves that place) or will let him throw a party at the house with his high school friends. That should let him enjoy himself. Not to mention, on his last birthday party, he went with me and Serg to Jillian's on South Boulevard and hung out with us and Serg's co-workers till 2 am! The kid was 15 and they let his ass stay... or maybe they just didn't see him. He wasn't drinking though, just hanging out. So, we do spoil him a lot and get him everything he wants cuz he's the "baby"... LOL. (If he finds out I called him baby he's gonna kick my ass.)

My Earthlink is messing up again. I am really starting to hate it... but then again, I cannot really direct my abhorrence towards Earthlink since the dreaded, malevolent, brobdingnagian conglomerate known as AOL/Time Warner and its coaxial diablerie are the ones providing the actual broadband service. Since it was installed in late 2003, it has never worked properly. The modem repeatedly resets itself and I constantly lose connection. In early December one of the HSD (high speed data) reps did something that fixed it until approximately last week. Last week I noticed the connection kept dropping again and although it will only drop for a few seconds, sometimes I lose all the data I am working with. Needless to say, this pisses the fuck out of me. Also, Earthlink comes with this nifty little "Total Access Toolbar" from which you can access your mailbox (which is very similar to that of Outlook Express), your FTP space, personal webpage, pop up blocker and parental controls and all other types of tools. Well, the damn thing is now taking up to 10 minutes to load and bring up my stuff... 10 freaking minutes on broadband.... WTF?!?!?. Trying to update the Janet pictures on the previous post took me my entire lunch hour and that's why I had to post them two days after it happened... Jeez! by then, it was old news!!!! LOL. I will call TWC tech support one of these days but they aggravate me so much with their lack of technical knowledge and their reps love to transfer you from one person to another until someone accidentally and conveniently drops your call.

I am fed up of work, it's a really easy job and it the lest stressful job I've ever had... but I'm not happy there. Something just doesn't feel right about it. I can't quite put my finger in it... but it kinda depressed me to be here. Just though I'd let you know that.

Felicia went to the doctor yesterday. She's two centimeters dilated which means she only has one more centimeter to go before Larissa is born. I can't wait. She has experienced a lot of pelvis pain lately and to tell you the truth I don't know if that's normal or a bad thing. She says it's nothing but I worry a lot about her. She refuses to stop working until the 10th of February and I just don't want her to hurt herself. I wish she'd stop working. But once something is embedded in her head, nobody will be able to change her mind. I was looking at the name Larissa yesterday, I already knew it was the 5th moon of plate and some Greek goddess daughter of Pelasgus and a bunch of other mythological crap I have never heard of. But one thing I also found out is that it means Cheerful in Russian. I had no idea, but I like the fact that stumbled upon that. The doctor told Felicia that Larissa might be bigger than Fabianna, but Fabianna is pure evil and mischief... lol. My baby is tremendous, my mom says she's almost as bad as I was, but I still take the crown. I am counting the days until Larissa gets here though... I can hardly wait.

Well, apparently, trying to search for someone else, several people in my office have stumbled upon my blog. Mostly because I have mentioned (in an awful way) that person. Nobody writes in it cuz they're afraid someone will find it and they will get in trouble. Weird.

Well, I have nothing else to write, except "I NEED A BEER!

Oh, one last thing... I don't proof read my shit because I spend all day proofreading my own report at work... I hit spellcheck and that's it. So, stop bitching about me proffreading my posts. Thank you, drive through.

Well, looks like I'm back at this...

I guess I am going to jump the wagon and start with the whole Janet Jackson fiasco. Yep... I sure will, and why you might ask... cuz I have always been infatuated with Miss. Jackson there... *drool, drool*. To be honest with you, I never really thought Janet would need to use stunts like these to be popular... I mean, shit... name one person you know that doesn't know of Janet Jackson! My grandmother in Mexico knows who the hell Janet Jackson is... lol. Well, I guess it was bound to happen though... I don't see where she needed it though. Her, as opposed to, per say, Madonna's slipping career or Britney's untalented one, has enough firepower in her talent to be beyond shit like this.... But, she has also been pulling, in a much less drastic and obviously years in the making, a Christina Aguilera metamorphosis... I think the cataclysm (and not in a negative way for most of us guys, lol) began with the video for Love Will Never Do (Without You). I think, for me at least, that was when I fell totally in love with her. Since then, the dark powers of the mutant Jackson gene began to take over.... I mean, she's fucking Jermaine Dupree for fuck's sake!!! LOL. Felicia told me she has some new material coming out that's supposed to be along the same lines of the stunt she pulled on the superbowl. I guess this was a way to get us ready, I also heard on the radio that hours after it happened they make her new single available for download... how fucking convenient. Well, all in all, aside from where she chose to do it, I don't mind that much... I am not going to complaint about taking a peek at her breasts... LOL now I am only gonna wait for the Janet Jackson sex tape to be "accidentally leaked" to the press. Then, I will be a happy man.




The superbowl was great, for the first time in my life I sat through whole game (with the exception of Hockey and Soccer, I can sit through several of those consecutively) and actually enjoyed it. Yes, in case you were going to say it, let me say it for you... I jumped in the Panther's bandwagon when I realized they were doing so great. SO!!!??? Fucking sue me! Anyway, The panther's were great, but kinda went overboard with the penalties there. All in all, I think I started to like football... cuz after that, I spent quite a few hours watching old football games in ESPN Classics. LOL. Maybe next year!

So, Takesha pissed me off for the last time last week. I have never, ever in my life told anybody that I did not ever want to speak to them again. Takesha just drove me to that point. I have never had problems with anybody and always took everyone's shit and attitude in a nonchalant way. But this girl was way out of hand, half the time I didn't even know if she was serious or joking... She made some horrible uncalled for comments such as "I don't care about you or what happens to you", she was extremely defensive at the slightest comment about her... oh and if you had a different point of view on something (especially religion)... don't even start your sentence cuz she will shut down completely... I don't know how to deal with people like that. The thing is, I really liked her and thought she was cool... but I realized she is used to be drooled on by every guy and I guess she expected me to do the same. Hopefully I'm totally wrong and I just overreacted cuz I hope she's not really like that. Today I replied to one of her messages in a non too friendly way, but I just couldn't handle her attitude anymore.

Today is Ricky's 16th birthday. I don't have any money to get him anything now so I will have to wait a few days before I get him something. sadly I have no idea what to get him. LOL. Well, I am tired of writing... I will keep up later.